I was driving the other day when I had a recurring thought come into my head.  I’ve had conversations before about how useful Mario Kart would be in the driving world of today.  I was driving in excess that day, a total of 3 hours, which is quite a lot for me. There are days when I don’t go outside of my home, literally, but that’s another story.  As such, I had a great amount of time on my hands to think. My thoughts began to race as my car was set to cruise control. I began to think about things from the stresses of life to the most random ideas. My aimless pondering then came to a screeching halt as I hit traffic in the oddest time of day. It was at this time my Mario Kart mode booted up.

If only I had a… My mind began thinking off all the possibilities of items I could instantly drop. However, I wanted to think of a strategic way to this. After all, you never know what those clue boxes will drop.

I first had to determine what character I would be. When I used to own at MK64, I typically would choose Bowser or Yoshi. Some players would shake their head at this, but somehow I knew how to make the best of those guys and win. In retrospect, being the dwarf size that I am, I think I would most resemble Toad. I think Toad would be the best fit for me now, although I would have to accept the fact that every time I got hit I would cry out, “Ooowww, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!”

Having my character chosen, I then began to analyze what items I would most use and in what situations they would be best for. Stuck in stop-and-go traffic and in a hurry? Time to pull out my star. Is that some idiot I see who can’t merge causing us to suddenly break? You’ve got a blue shell coming your way, my friend. You want to speed up right as I’m attempting to pass you? I think a red shell is in order for you. Whoops, I was the jerk who cut you off that time –time for ghost mode. Geez, those mushrooms would come in handy to get through those intersections that always like to turn red on me so quickly. To those who love tailgating me, I must warn you, I will not hold back from dropping a question mark box for you. Last but certainly not least, a shout out to those who aren’t content in staying in 1 lane for more than 60 seconds, a lightning bolt is in store. As such, I will gladly run over your bite-sized body, leaving you thin as a cracker and swaying back and forth in the air like a feather.

I seriously don’t suffer from road rage… not a clinical diagnosis away. I do, however, like to entertain the thought of living in the MK64 world.  In this world of people who seem like they got their driver’s license out of a Cracker Jack box, this is my way to cope. So, for now, I will just mentally send you little items to show you my opinion on your driving skills.

I once was taught that anything can be addicting if it gives you some amount of pleasure.  Gaming is no exception.  Whether it’s MMORPGs, RPGs, console games, or LARPing, each of them exposes players to a new world than the one they’ve been living.  Suddenly, one more level doesn’t fulfill us, we count down the days to a new expansion, and it isn’t “just a game” anymore.  Even our language goes through a weird metamorphosis.

I wasn’t always a gamer.  Sure, I played some games here and there, but I wouldn’t have called myself a gamer until I met my husband.  I’ll never forget the first time I heard him talking with his friends in gamer language. “Your rogue is a twink so you were able to pwn some noobs?” I questioned with a raised eyebrow. “It’s gamer talk,” he replied.  “Oh…” I felt completely out of the loop.  As I listened to their conversation carry, I felt as if I had to learn this new language but was a little turned off at the lack of proper grammar this new vocabulary would include.  Yet, here I am today gladly telling you I’ve become one of your fellow gamers.  Only, I’m finding it hard to transition back to “real” life.

You see, I, like most of you, forget that most of the world doesn’t speak geeky gamer language.  Calling some idiot driver a level 1 noob won’t really offend them; rather, probably just confuse them.  I find myself not just using “LoL or lawl” but shouting, “Ding!” when I see my son learn a new “skill”, asking if something happened in game or “irl”, or almost saying “woot” instead of “amen” in church.  Just a few weeks ago, I was transcribing for a new doctor who obviously was struggling.  My first thought was, ‘What a noob.’  I’m pretty bad with this, but I probably wouldn’t even fit the definition of gamer to real gamers.

I acknowledge that I’m not the only one who brings the game with them to real life.  I now laugh when I hear people say, “It’s just a game.”  It does become a culture, but I do have to remind myself that I can’t always replace letters with numbers to spell words or tack on a trail of Z’s at the end of words.  However, it’s nice to know there is a community of geeks, just like me, who find gaming addicting and have formed our new little language that I’m still constantly learning.